Have you ever?

Have you ever felt like you should do something? Something uncomfortable, even frightening. I’m not talking about that weird show where you had to eat earthworms for money. I’m talking facing fears, standing up when you want to sit down, speaking out when you’re so much more comfortable staying in the background.

The truth about me is that I hover somewhere between loving my people time–going to activities, heading up projects, book club, signings, etc. and enjoying the solitude of life. If there can be any solitude found when you have as many children as you do fingers on one hand. Ha ha! Not much solo time ’round here folks! 

A couple of years ago I attended a week of Education at BYU in Provo, Utah. The subjects were varied, the speakers phenomenal, the whole experience amazing. But that week, this little voice told me I needed to start speaking to the youth. Ha ha. Yeah right. Me? Are you kidding? The girl who was home schooled through middle and high school and therefore has no frame of reference for what youth today are experiencing? Me, who was so shy and quiet during my teen years I hardly said a word to the boys in my church class. (So embarrassing!) I pushed that little voice into the closet where it belonged and continued my general church service. Cause, see, here’s the thing. My husband is a perennial scout/young men leader. He has served in those callings involving the young men in our church ages 11-18 for almost our ENTIRE marriage save a few short stints in other positions, including about 1.5 years when I served the young ladies in our ward. Yep. I am pretty much NEVER going to be able to serve  the young women until all our kids are grown and suddenly we can both be gone on a weeknight and off to campouts , etc.

So why should I even worry about talking to the youth? I teach the women at church, sub in Primary on occasion, and love it. I write books for young people and women. There, I’m off the hook right?

Well, not so much.

That feeling continued to grow stronger until the end of last year. I looked at the new theme for the youth of our church and something inside of me just stood up and said, “Hey, let’s write a little book about how to do this.”

Ha ha ha! Hysterical laughter followed.

But that voice was serious. And soon I could think of nothing else. I was getting ideas and contacting people because I can’t just write a book. I have to just…know more. You see, I love the youth. I admire and adore them so very much. I see them for who they really are and it fills me with excitement and joy. And do you know what, I have one of them in my house. That little person I gave birth to, the one who made me a mommy and has been my favorite first child in the whole wide world? He’s 12 now and he’s in this zone of growth and confusion and struggle and joy. I love his guts. And I couldn’t stop writing. 

Vintage Navigation Background Illustration With Steering Wheel, Charts, Anchor, Chains

This book, EMBARK IN HIS SERVICE, has been the hardest to write. I can honestly say that writing is a beautiful struggle anyway. I love almost every moment of it. Finding the perfect words to impart your message is tricky. To teens, even harder. But then, the opposition. The adversary poking me with doubts, filling me with despair and telling me over and over that this was not something I could do. I have never felt my weaknesses so strong as I did writing these words. 

You think that old serpent would know this by now, but when I know it’s right and you try to stop me, I just get that much more stubborn. I get that much more determined. And because I am growing up just a little bit, I turned to God. I begged Him for the courage to be who He needs me to be. This whole thing: every single word I wrote — it’s Him. It’s like I opened up my brain and He poured in the words that trickled out through my fingertips and into this message. It’s a call to serve. It’s a charge to be more. It’s a warning to prepare NOW because the waiting is over. 

I reread the words through my edits and marveled at what He told me. HIS WORDS. I am not that smooth or inspired. I’m just not. I take no credit. GOD is amazing. He can move mountains. He can write books. HE can rescue every child He has sent to this earth.

It’s coming out March 15, 2015. Tell your friends. Notify your youth. They need this book in their hands. Tell them He sent you.


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